How social media could be damaging your relationship — and what to do about it.
People were given a stress test involving putting their hand into cold water.
People gained weight despite eating more healthily.
People gained weight despite eating more healthily.
Being in a settled relationship increases the chances of weight gain, new research finds.
Over the 10 years of the study, couples put on more weight than single people.
The weight gain occurred despite couples eating more healthily, including consuming more fruits and vegetables.
It may be partly because couples feel free to ‘let themselves go’.
Having children may increase weight gain even more as parents tend to eat their snacks and leftovers.
The study’s authors write:
“…couples were more likely [than single people] to meet recommendations for fruit, vegetable, fast food and alcohol consumption, and they were more likely to be a non-smoker.
These findings are consistent with the results from previous research showing that being in a committed romantic relationship is associated with health promoting behaviours.”
The conclusions come from a study of 15,001 people in Australia who were followed for 10 years.
The results showed that couples put on more weight than single people in this period.
It may be partly because people tend to eat more together than they do alone:
“…whilst family meals may include more healthy foods such as fruits and vegetables and less fast food, people often consume larger portion sizes and more calories in the company of others than they do alone
[…]Further, the unhealthy but tempting eating habits of one spouse may migrate to the other.
For example, [one study] showed that husbands detrimentally influence the diet of their wives by increasing the consumption of fat and meat.”
Couples are also usually less concerned with attracting a partner, the authors write:
“Another interesting explanation is the marriage-market theory which suggests that married people who are no longer concerned with attracting a mate gain weight.
Entry into cohabitation or marriage is associated with a decline in the desire to maintain weight for the purpose of attracting a mate.”
The study was published in the journal PLoS ONE (Schoeppe et al., 2018).
The skill that improves both romantic relationships and parenting skills.
The skill that improves both romantic relationships and parenting skills.
Being tuned in to the other person’s needs is the simple skill that improves relationships, research finds.
Psychologists call it ‘responsive caregiving’ and it means being aware of your partner’s mood and how to respond to it.
For example, sometimes people want cheering up, other times they prefer to be left alone.
Responsive caregiving not only improves relationships between parents, but is also good for children.
The study revealed that a common set of skills improved all family relationships.
Dr Abigail Millings, who led the study, said:
“It might be the case that practicing being sensitive and responsive — for example, by really listening and by really thinking about the other person’s perspective — to our partners will also help us to improve these skills with our kids.
But we need to do more research to see whether the association can actually be used in this way.”
The study involved 125 couples and their children.
The results revealed that responsive caregiving was the key to being a good partner and was also linked to good relationships with children.
Dr Millings said:
“If you can do responsive caregiving, it seems that you can do it across different relationships.
[It is the] capacity to be ‘tuned in’ to what the other person needs.In romantic relationships and in parenting, this might mean noticing when the other person has had a bad day, knowing how to cheer them up, and whether they even want cheering up.
[And it’s not] just about picking you up when you’re down, it’s also about being able to respond appropriately to the good stuff in life.”
The study was published in the journal Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin (Millings et al., 2013).
The trait is linked higher relationship satisfaction in both partners.
This could be why you’re still single or happily married.
This could be why you’re still single or happily married.
People inherit their relationship patterns from their mothers, new research finds.
Both men and women whose mothers have a higher number of romantic partners are likely to have more partners themselves.
Similarly, mothers who divorce or serially cohabit, have children who are more likely to divorce and serially cohabit.
A person is more likely to break up their cohabitation if their mother also does so frequently.
It is probably because mothers pass on their relationship patterns to their children.
Dr Claire Kamp Dush, who led the study, said:
“Our results suggest that mothers may have certain characteristics that make them more or less desirable on the marriage market and better or worse at relationships.
Children inherit and learn those skills and behaviors and may take them into their own relationships.”
The study followed over 3,200 mothers and their children for 24 years.
It tracked how people married and divorced across the generations and their subsequent relationships.
Dr Kamp Dush said:
“It’s not just divorce now.
Many children are seeing their parents divorce, start new cohabiting relationships, and having those end as well.
All of these relationships can influence children’s outcomes, as we see in this study.”
Those who saw their mothers having more relationships tended to copy this themselves.
Dr Kamp Dush said:
“You may see cohabitation as an attractive, lower-commitment type of relationship if you’ve seen your mother in such a relationship for a longer time.
That may lead to more partners since cohabitating relationships are more likely to break-up.”
Mothers pass on their characteristics to their children, Dr Kamp Dush said:
“What our results suggest is that mothers may pass on their marriageable characteristics and relationship skills to their children — for better or worse.
It could be that mothers who have more partners don’t have great relationship skills, or don’t deal with conflict well, or have mental health problems, each of which can undermine relationships and lead to instability.
Whatever the exact mechanisms, they may pass these characteristics on to their children, making their children’s relationships less stable.”
The study was published in the journal PLOS ONE (Kamp Dush et al., 2018).
This is how your relationship affects your sleep.
This is how your relationship affects your sleep.
Having a responsive partner is linked to better sleep, research finds.
Responsiveness means more than just listening, it is being tuned in to your partner’s needs and feeling compassion.
The most powerful way of being responsive is firstly, listening to and understanding what they are going through and secondly, responding with sympathy and compassion.
Responsiveness creates a sense of validation and feeling cared for.
Dr Emre Selçuk, the study’s lead author, said:
“Our findings show that individuals with responsive partners experience lower anxiety and arousal, which in turn improves their sleep quality.”
Sleep has the most restorative effect when it is high quality and uninterrupted.
People sleep better when they feel safe and secure, Dr Selçuk said:
“Having responsive partners who would be available to protect and comfort us should things go wrong is the most effective way for us humans to reduce anxiety, tension, and arousal.”
The conclusions come from 698 married and cohabiting couples.
All completed measures of partner responsiveness and any sleep problems.
The results revealed that those who felt the most cared for, validated and understood had the best sleep.
Dr Selçuk said:
“Taken together, the corpus of evidence we obtained in recent years suggests that our best bet for a happier, healthier, and a longer life is having a responsive partner.”
The study was published in the journal Social Personality and Psychological Science (Selcuk et al., 2016).
Partners experienced better physical and emotional wellbeing even three weeks later.
Partners experienced better physical and emotional wellbeing even three weeks later.
Giving and receiving massages helps to improve relationships, new research finds.
Both partners experienced better physical and emotional wellbeing even three weeks after the study was over.
After massages, couples felt better able to cope with stress whether or not they were giving or receiving.
Ms Sayuri Naruse, the study’s first author, said:
“The benefits of receiving a massage from a professional are well documented, but this research shows how a similar outcome can be obtained by couples with little prior training and experience of the activity.”
The study included 38 people who were given a three-week massage course.
Along with the psychological and physical benefits, most couples continued to use massage after the course finished.
Ms Naruse said:
“These findings show that massage can be a simple and effective way for couples to improve their physical and mental wellbeing whilst showing affection for one another.
Our data also suggests that these positive effects of a short massage course may be long lasting, as is reflected in 74 per cent of the sample continuing to use massage after the course had finished.
Massage is a cost effective and pleasant intervention that isn’t just for a therapeutic setting but can be easily incorporated into a healthy couple’s daily routine.”
The study was published in the Journal of Health Psychology (Naruse et al., 2018).
The pattern is highly damaging to some relationships.
It leads to improved relationship satisfaction and connection the very next day.
It leads to improved relationship satisfaction and connection the very next day.
Being grateful to your partner works as an instant ‘booster shot’ for relationships, research finds.
Among couples, feeling grateful leads to improved relationship satisfaction and connection the very next day.
Little thoughtful gestures by one partner — like a back rub, a small gift or holding hands — increased feelings of gratitude.
Feeling grateful then generates a cascade of positive feelings.
The study’s lead author, Dr Sara Algoe, said:
“Feelings of gratitude and generosity are helpful in solidifying our relationships with people we care about, and benefit to the one giving as well as the one on the receiving end.”
The study tracked the day-to-day experiences of 65 couples in ongoing, committed relationships.
The results showed that the effects of gratefulness could be seen the next day, in terms of increased relationship satisfaction.
Partners responded strongly when shown their needs were being acknowledged.
Dr Algoe said:
“Gratitude triggers a cascade of responses within the person who feels it in that very moment, changing the way the person views the generous benefactor, as well as motivations toward the benefactor.
This is especially true when a person shows that they care about the partner’s needs and preferences.”
The study was published in the journal Personal Relationships (Algoe et al., 2010).
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