This simple act can drastically reduce your parenting stress and relationship satisfaction.
An unexpected emotional tool for beating bad habits.
An emotion that helps with appreciating your partner and feeling appreciated by them.
Experiencing more gratitude is linked to greater happiness and fewer psychological problems.
Experiencing more gratitude is linked to greater happiness and fewer psychological problems.
People can train themselves to be more grateful in just 15 minutes per day, research finds.
Experiencing more gratitude is linked to greater happiness and fewer psychological problems.
People who worked on their gratitude over six weeks enjoyed a long-term boost to their well-being, researchers found.
Other studies have linked gratitude to more satisfaction, motivation, better social ties and improved relationships.
Typical activities to increase gratitude include keeping a gratitude journal, expressing gratitude to others and reflecting on the positive effects of adversity.
Professor Ernst Bohlmeijer, the study’s first author, said:
“Training gratitude is not a trick to be happy quickly.
It is developing a new attitude to life.
Life becomes less self-evident and that makes people more flexible.”
The study included 217 people, one-third of whom did the gratitude exercises for six weeks.
The exercises included focusing on feeling appreciative, expressing gratitude to others, keeping a gratitude journal and writing positively about their own lives.
People in the study did these exercises for 15 minutes per day.
The results showed that one-third of participants felt higher well-being and this was maintained over six months after the intervention.
In the comparison groups only around half as many people felt higher well-being.
While gratitude involves focusing on what is good in life, it does not mean ignoring life’s challenges, said Professor Bohlmeijer:
“It is important to say that the idea is not to ignore negative experiences.
Acknowledging difficulties and psychological distress, while also appreciating the good things in life, is possible.
In fact, that’s the essence of psychological resilience.”
The study was published in the Journal of Happiness Studies (Bohlmeijer et al., 2020).
Practicing gratitude makes people happier, increases self-control, builds social ties and more. Discover 15 ways to be more grateful.
Practicing gratitude makes people happier, increases self-control, builds social ties and more. Discover 15 ways to be more grateful.
Gratitude, a positive feeling of thankfulness, is the new miracle emotion.
Although gratitude has been around for as long as human beings, it’s only relatively recently started to get the thumbs-up from science.
So here are 15 ways to maximise your own gratitude, whatever level you start from, followed by 10 ways gratitude can change your life.
Gratitude is certainly an emotion that’s worth cultivating and it is something that can be cultivated.
Studies have repeatedly shown that we can train things sometimes thought of as hard-wired or pre-set, like our gratitude, optimism and enthusiasm.
So here are 15 things to try…
Think of three things that you are grateful for: that benefit you and without which your life would be poorer.
Then, if you’ve got time, you can think about the causes for these good things.
And that’s it.
Read more on this simple gratitude exercise.
Sit down, daily, and write about the things for which you are grateful.
Start with whatever springs to mind and work from there.
Try not to write the same thing every day but explore your gratefulness.
The way things are now may seem better in the light of bad memories.
Don’t forget the bad things that have happened, the contrast may encourage gratefulness.
Choose someone you know, then first consider what you have received from them, second what you have given to them and thirdly what trouble you have caused them.
This may lead to discovering you owe others more than you thought.
Whether you are Buddhist, Christian, Jewish, Muslim or atheist, a ritualised form of giving thanks may help increase gratitude.
80 percent of people say they are thankful for their health.
If so, then get back in touch with the simple human fact of being able to sense what is out there: use your vision, touch, taste and smell to experience the world, and be thankful you can.
Two big obstacles to being grateful are simply forgetting and failing to be mindful.
So leave a note of some kind reminding you to be grateful.
It could be a post-it, an object in your home or another person to nudge you occasionally.
Promise on whatever you hold holy that you’ll be more grateful.
Sounds crazy?
There’s a study to show it works.
Called ‘automatic thoughts’ or self-talk in cognitive therapy, these are the habitual things we say to ourselves all day long.
What if you said to yourself: “My life is a gift” all day long?
Too cheesy?
OK, what about: “Every day is a surprise”.
It’ll take a big creative leap to be thankful to the people who you most despise.
But big creative leaps are just the kind of things likely to set off a change in yourself.
Give it a try.
Gratitude can work like a kind of glue for your relationship.
Saying thanks for the small things that partners do for each other can work wonders.
It is especially true if they are everyday acts that might often go unnoticed.
Studies suggest men lag behind women in experiencing and expressing gratitude.
Still, both sexes can benefit from making an effort to be thankful for their relationships.
But don’t just think it, say it.
Better still, do something to show it.
We all like to take credit for our own achievements.
But when you think about it, are they really all our own achievements?
Did we not receive a little help along the way from others?
Everyone likes to hear that their advice was helpful or that it was their assistance that helped you over the line.
Don’t be shy. Let them know they helped.
A favourite of psychologists doing studies on gratitude, the list is an easy way to boost the positive emotion of gratitude.
Do it anytime you like, in as much or as little detail as you like.
In fact, no need to write down, just take a moment now to think of one or two things you feel thankful for.
We’ve all given someone a ‘thanks’ that was less than enthusiastic, perhaps bordering on sarcastic.
So, the next time you say grazie, gracias, merci, arigatô or danke, do it with style.
Using body language is the easiest way to boost a thank you up from humdrum to heartening.
Lean in, smile, even use a touch on the upper arm — at least make sure you are looking them in the eye.
Say thank you like you really mean it.
Because, of course, you do, don’t you?
This is towards the more hardcore end of gratitude.
Try writing a gratitude letter to someone who has never been properly thanked.
(Better that it is an actual letter; a gratitude email doesn’t hit the same high notes.)
Tell them how much you appreciate what they have done for you and how much it means.
They will feel great receiving it (apart from anything else, who gets handwritten letters any more?) and you will feel great sending it.
Repeat any, all or none of these exercises at regular intervals.
If it’s none, because they don’t work for you, then invent your own, or reconnect with an existing way of practicing gratefulness which is personal to you.
The more you can keep at it, the more likely it is to become a habit.
And here are 10 benefits of cultivating gratitude:
Gratitude is different things to different people: amongst them could be counting your blessings, savouring what life has given you, thanking someone or wondering at the natural world.
Whatever form it takes, one of the best known and most researched effects of practicing gratitude is it makes you happier.
Participants in one study were 25% happier, on average, after practicing a little gratitude over a 10-week period.
Gratitude isn’t just about feeling better, it’s also about thinking better.
In other words: it’s not just a fleeting sensation, it can also be a thought that sustains you.
That’s why people who feel more gratitude also feel more satisfied with their lives.
Gratitude better enables people to notice the things they do have, rather than mourning what’s missing.
When we say ‘thank you’ to others, it’s an expression of gratitude, but it can also act as a powerful motivator for them to help us again.
It could be as simple as sending a thank you email when someone has helped you out.
A gratitude study found that a thank you email doubled the number of people willing to help in the future:
“…the effect of ‘thank you’ was quite substantial: while only 32% of participants receiving the neutral email helped with the second letter, when Eric expressed his gratitude, this went up to 66%.”
They also found that:
“…people weren’t providing more help because they felt better or it boosted their self-esteem, but because they appreciated being needed and felt more socially valued when they’d been thanked.”
We all need some stuff in our lives, but sometimes the desire for more things can get out of control.
And our nascent desire for stuff is heavily encouraged by society in so many ways.
Gratitude can combat materialism by helping us appreciate what we already have.
As the Greek philosopher Epicurus said:
“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.”
By law, all credit cards should have this quote across the front in fluorescent pink.
It’s not true that the emotions tend to get in the way of decision-making; that we should be ‘cold’ and ‘calculating’ to make the right choices.
Quite the reverse: the feeling of gratitude can actually help people make the right decisions.
Professor Ye Li, whose research has established a link between gratitude and self-control explains:
“Showing that emotion can foster self-control and discovering a way to reduce impatience with a simple gratitude exercise opens up tremendous possibilities for reducing a wide range of societal ills from impulse buying and insufficient saving to obesity and smoking.”
It probably works because gratitude makes us feel less selfish, which gives us more patience.
Encouraging gratitude in children can have remarkable effects.
One study found that kids who are more grateful feel life has more meaning, get more satisfaction from life, are happier and experience less negative emotions.
Dr. Giacomo Bono, who led the study, said his findings suggested:
“…that gratitude may be strongly linked with life-skills such as cooperation, purpose, creativity and persistence and, as such, gratitude is vital resource that parents, teachers and others who work with young people should help youth build up as they grow up.
More gratitude may be precisely what our society needs to raise a generation that is ready to make a difference in the world.”
Being grateful to your partner for all the little kindnesses they do can make all the difference to a relationship.
Research by Dr. Sara Algoe and colleagues, found that gratitude helps to maintain intimate relationships.
Algoe said:
“Feelings of gratitude and generosity are helpful in solidifying our relationships with people we care about, and benefit to the one giving as well as the one on the receiving end.”
Just as very close intimate relationships benefit from gratitude; so do our wider ties to family and friends.
Gratitude has been linked to many positive social outcomes:
It really seems that gratitude has the power to deepen our connections with others.
Although there’s relatively little research on this, gratitude has been linked to better physical health, especially better sleep, and lower levels of stress.
Given that both stress levels and sleep are related to general physical health, this is not a surprise.
Given that the world can be a nasty place, filled with nasty surprises, it’s vital to have good coping skills.
People with gratitude tend to have just that.
When faced with challenges in life, they tend to eschew denial, self-blame and substance abuse in favour of active coping, seeking support from others, positive reinterpretation and growth.
Like everything in life, we can get fed up with gratitude after a while if it gets to samey.
Avoid gratitude burnout by remembering that all things must come to an end — enjoy them while you still can.
In one study:
“…being encouraged to think grateful thoughts was not enough to increase happiness.
What made the grateful thoughts beneficial was focusing on the imminent end of this pleasurable experience.
Thinking about endpoints as a way of stimulating gratitude can be beneficial.
Finite ends seem to inspire people to think carefully about what it is they have, because soon enough, and usually sooner than we would like to think, it will be gone.”
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The best ways of expressing gratitude.
When an emotion can be more powerful in curbing impulsiveness than thoughts.
Simple gratitude interventions have previously been found to enhance happiness, satisfaction, self-control, health and resilience.
Simple gratitude interventions have previously been found to enhance happiness, satisfaction, self-control, health and resilience.
A simple gratitude exercise helps to boost people’s motivation, a study finds.
People who listed five things to be grateful for each day over a period of six days displayed significantly increased motivation.
Despite only completing the gratitude exercise for less than a week, the boost to motivation lasted at least three months.
Simple gratitude interventions have previously been found to enhance happiness, satisfaction, self-control, health and resilience.
Dr Norberto Eiji Nawa, the study’s first author, said:
“Our main hypothesis was that engaging in an online gratitude journal by writing down up to five things one felt grateful for each day could make students be more aware of their academic opportunities–their ‘blessings’–and help them re-evaluate their motives and goals, ultimately improving their motivation.”
For the study, 84 Japanese college students were split into a control and intervention group.
Over six days, the intervention group were prompted to list five things they were grateful for.
This was done online to make it more accessible, explained Professor Noriko Yamagishi, study co-author:
“Online interventions have the advantage of being more accessible, scalable and affordable to large portions of the population.
Gathering solid evidence to support their deployment will be essential to unleash their true potential in the future.”
Students who did the gratitude exercise felt increased motivation for at least three months afterwards.
The boost was mainly driven by a reduction in helplessness and incompetence.
When the students felt that they could make a difference to their results by putting in some effort, it helped boost their motivation.
Not only does gratitude help motivate the self, it can also help motivate others.
When we say ‘thank you’ to others, it can also act as a powerful motivator for them to help us again.
It could be as simple as sending a thank you email when someone has helped you out.
A gratitude study found that a thank you email doubled the number of people willing to help in the future:
“…the effect of ‘thank you’ was quite substantial: while only 32% of participants receiving the neutral email helped with the second letter, when Eric expressed his gratitude, this went up to 66%.”
The study was published in the journal BMC Psychology (Nawa & Yamagishi, 2021).
The emotion helps people enjoy the positive aspects of each day even more.
Despite worries for the future, elderly Japanese developed a type of ‘quiet hope’.
Despite worries for the future, elderly Japanese developed a type of ‘quiet hope’.
An attitude of gratitude keeps people feeling hopeful despite the challenges of aging.
Being thankful helps people to feel more optimistic, especially when experiencing difficulties and anxieties related to getting older.
The conclusions come from a study of people in their 80s and 90s in Japan.
Despite worries for the future, people developed a type of ‘quiet hope’.
Dr Iza Kavedzija, the study’s author, said:
“As people move through life, through their later years, many experience a sense of loss.
But this time for them also offers opportunities to reflect more on life, with a heightened realisation of their interconnections with others.
If one habitually invokes the involvement of others and their role in one’s life, one is reminded how much other people have helped them, in countless small and more substantive ways.
The same events seem different when one focuses on how others have helped.”
The anthropological study was carried out in the city of Osaka.
Dr Kavedzija found that older people experienced many common worries about aging: such as developing dementia or becoming a burden on their children.
They accepted this uncertainty, though, and remained actively involved with the wider community.
That involvement fed a sense of confidence and security.
Key to this was thinking about the past with gratitude, Dr Kavedzija said:
“An attitude of gratitude was embedded in older peoples’ recollections of the past, but also allowed them to think about the present in a hopeful way.
A world in which one has received much good will from others is a different place than one in which one has experienced loss, even if the facts of life are the same.
Gratitude in Japan can be seen to a large extent as a recognition of how much one relies on others as one moves through life.
Gratitude highlights feelings of interdependence in the social world.”
Older people were thankful for those who had played a significant role in their lives.
They were thankful for their partners, families, the opportunity to work and lead a full a life.
Dr Kavedzija said:
“While people in Japan might hesitate to say they are happy, gratitude is mentioned frequently.
Through appreciation, dependence on others is not seen as simply a burden or a potential source of embarrassment, but also as moving and deeply meaningful.
Meaningful relationships and encounters with others comprise a valuable foundation for what Japanese people call ikigai, or that which makes life worth living.”
The study was published in the journal Anthropology & Aging (Kavedzija, 2020).
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